There is a lot of truth in the belief that wedding planning is a stressful occasion. However, there is also plenty of excitement and magic. Choosing your attire, getting alterations to achieve a gorgeous fit, and wearing it for the first time is an unforgettable, breathtaking experience.
There are many superstitions about bridal attire and who gets to see it. However, not much is widely discussed about the groom’s clothes. Here are six things a bride should know when deciding whether or not she wants to see the groom’s suit:
- The question, “Can the bride see the groom’s suit?” may have roots in the era of arranged marriages.
- There are not many superstitions surrounding the groom’s suit.
- If you want a first look, the bride should not see the groom’s suit beforehand.
- Most brides end up seeing their grooms’ suits, anyway.
- Whether the bride can see the groom’s suit depends on the couple’s preferences.
- Looking at the suit while it is on a hanger is a compromise to consider.
Intriguing Facts About Seeing the Groom’s Suit
1. This question may have roots in the era of arranged marriages.
Before the 18th century, arranged marriages were the norm. Relatives, close friends, and dedicated marriage brokers would arrange for one man and woman to come together in a partnership for various reasons.
Specifically, marriage as an institution served vital economic functions. It provided a framework for inheritance between generations, ensured the survival of a lineage, allowed families to settle debts, gave the illusion of social mobility, and more.
In most cases, the individuals chosen for arranged marriages cannot object to the union. The marriage broker, be it a parent or a cultural figure, would go to any lengths to prevent any refusal or objection.
Various wedding beliefs and traditions came out of this effort. Some brides had to wear veils to cover their faces, preventing their grooms from finding them unattractive and backing out.
The tradition of not letting the bride and groom see each other before the ceremony may have similar roots. In an arranged marriage wherein both parties have not met each other yet, not knowing what their partner looks like lessens the chance of them running away.
Nowadays, the custom of arranged marriage persists in select countries like Cambodia. Many Middle Eastern, South Asian, North African, and Caucasian cultures also retain this practice.
2. There are not many superstitions surrounding the groom’s suit.
There are many beliefs and superstitions associated with the bride and her attire. Many believed that letting the groom see her wedding dress meant bad luck. Some cultures even prohibit brides from wearing particular colors or trying on accessories before the big day.
However, the same cannot be said for grooms. There is no fear of misfortune, accidents, or attracting evil spirits attached to his attire. At least none that is recorded or well-known.
Oppositely, there is a Scottish wish for luck related to the groom. Custom says that a groom must wear a sprig of white heather in the buttonhole of his suit. If he does, their marriage will receive good fortune.
3. If you want a first look, the bride should not see the groom’s suit beforehand.
You may have seen adorable pictures of couples seeing each other in their wedding attire for the first time. The sunlight is romantic, they are crying tears of joy, and the emotions are clear on their face.
These pictures come from a “first look,” which is precisely what its name denotes — couples coming together and finally seeing each other in full garb.
If a first look sounds like something you and your partner want, add it to your itinerary. Though you have to get up earlier and pay your photographer more, the results are more than worth the extra bucks.
That said, it is in your best interest not to let each other see your wedding attire. This act allows you to surprise one another during the moment itself, letting the photographer capture your genuine reactions and overwhelming emotions.
4. Most brides end up seeing their grooms’ suits, anyway.
Most brides are highly involved in the planning of their weddings. Some people have dreamed of this special day for years because they want it to be as close to perfect as possible.
In daily life, brides and grooms consult each other for various decisions. Men typically ask their partners what they should wear, which color looks good on them, and whatnot. Most men appreciate the help, especially on such a momentous occasion.
While it is uncommon for grooms to accompany their brides to wedding dress shopping, brides usually attend a fitting and give input on their grooms’ attire. Additionally, brides might assist tailors as they measure and make alterations to the clothes.
Unlike their brides, some grooms are not keen to participate in wedding planning. In this case, the bride’s presence at a fitting with him and his groomsmen is essential. She knows the color scheme, theme, and general vibe of the ceremony. Without her input, the men’s attire might look out of place.
In some cases, some brides ultimately choose their grooms’ attire. This situation can happen for several personal reasons. However, the couple needs to communicate openly and healthily when making massive decisions.
5. Whether the bride can see the groom’s suit depends on the couple’s preferences.
Before going into wedding planning, you have undoubtedly come across various beliefs and notions about marriage. You may have heard your relatives talk about superstitions, read articles about etiquette, or learned cultural traditions in a social sciences class.
You may feel compelled to observe certain traditions and abide by pieces of etiquette. Understandably so, as they would not be traditions and etiquette for no reason.
However, as with any other aspect of a wedding, you are free to personalize how you want your special day to go. This principle extends to seeing each other’s attire for the first time.
As mentioned above, if you want to have a “first look” moment to start your day, then hide your outfits from each other. Go the extra mile and have separate areas to get ready in, then work with the photographer to find the best spot for a photoshoot.
However, if you feel indifferent about this minor detail or personal or logistical reasons prevent you from executing it, that is not a problem. Make your wedding day special in your unique way.
Talk to your partner about this decision. Have an open-minded conversation about your opinions and priorities. Settle any differences or work together until you find a reasonable compromise.
6. Looking at the suit while it is on a hanger is a compromise to consider.
As stated above, there might be a case where you need to find a compromise. Perhaps the groom wants to show his suit to the bride, but she refuses to do so because of superstitions. He might mention that there are no connotations of bad luck attached to his tuxedo, but the bride might refuse to budge.
A witty and easy compromise for this disagreement is placing the suit or tuxedo on a hanger. The groom can hold it in front of his body or hang it somewhere. Either way, the bride technically gets to see the suit without the groom having to wear it.
The groom can also simply show a picture of his suit while it is still at the tailor. He can take a photo while the attire is on a mannequin or send a selfie of him wearing the tuxedo during a fitting.
Superstitions and cultural beliefs remain an integral part of society. There is no harm in believing something brings bad luck or interpreting certain things as negative omens. Likewise, there is no harm in asking, “Can the bride see the groom’s suit?” and other questions if you are curious.
Mahatma Gandhi once said, “Man is the maker of his own destiny.” Even if there exists a pessimistic connotation with the bride seeing her groom’s suit, you have the power to control your life and make the best of it.