Wedding letters are a common tradition between the bride and groom. These are read before the ceremony starts, usually on the morning of the day itself, or right before their first look. However, many couples struggle to effectively verbalize their thoughts and feelings in a heartfelt letter.
The process of writing a heartfelt letter for your wife starts with a reflection on your relationship. This will allow you to personalize the content and be as sincere as you can. The most important part of writing a wedding letter is to speak from the heart.
The words you write in your letter carry a lot of significance. Thus, you must know how to compose a heartfelt letter that can effectively communicate your feelings. Some examples are also provided below to use as an inspiration and reference.
Writing a Letter for Your Wife on Your Wedding Day: A Guide
Reflect on Your Relationship
Regardless of how long you waited before getting married, take some time to reflect on your relationship. Odds are the stress of wedding planning has taken over your lives to some degree. Remembering what made you fall in love with her, what you like about her, and other memorable moments in your relationship is the best way to start writing.
Personalize the Content
Besides getting you in the mood to write a heartfelt and romantic letter, you can also use these memorable and significant moments in your relationship as content for the letter itself.
This is the moment to pour your emotions, thoughts, and aspirations. Let your wife know how she fits into your vision of the future, how you cannot wait to start this new adventure together, or how nervous but excited you are about the wedding ceremony.
The nature of your relationship also influences how you write your letter. Some couples may prefer a more sentimental and emotional letter; some are straightforward and tell it like it is; some go the comedic route and inject wit into their paragraphs.
Speak from the Heart
The most important part of the process of writing a letter for your wife on your wedding day is to be genuine and sincere. Express what you truly feel, unabashedly profess your emotions, and be honest.
The eloquence or lyricism of your writing does not matter. You do not have to pressure yourself to use flowery words and literary techniques. At the end of the day, your wife will remember your sentiments, emotions, and sincerity, not your turn of phrase or the aesthetic component of your letter.
Things to Mention in Your Heartfelt Letter
A Significant Day or Moment in Your Relationship
This includes the day you met, your first date, your engagement, and so on. Let your wife know what you remember the most about that day, how you felt, and how it has shaped your relationship to be the way it is today.
A Milestone You Reached Together
As a couple, you have plenty of shared experiences. More than that, you have conquered challenges, gone on adventures, and overcome obstacles together. Talk about an essential milestone that you reached, such as graduating together, a certain anniversary, and so on. Reflect on how special and unforgettable this milestone is, and how it made your relationship even stronger.
What You Love About Her
Be affectionate, romantic, and even flirty in your heartfelt letter. Tell her how beautiful, funny, or talented she is. Talk about what made you fall in love with her and when you realized she was the one. Make her feel extra special on your special day with sincere words of affirmation.
What Makes You Proud About Her
Your wife could have contributed a lot to the planning process. She could have stood her ground and chose to be true to herself. Let your wife know what she has done that makes you proud and inspires you to be a better version of yourself.
Your Vows and Promises
The exchanging of vows is an optional part of a wedding ceremony. On some occasions, the vows to be said are part of a tradition or have been pre-written. Regardless, your self-written vows can be included in your wedding letter. Tell her your promises and how you intend on keeping them.
Something that Makes Her Laugh or Smile
If you and your wife have an inside joke, it can be a fitting addition to your wedding letter, especially if the inside joke revolves around the wedding itself. This will not only make her giggle as she reads it, but it will also help ease her nerves for the ceremony.
Your Ring Engravement
Your wedding ring engravement can be a subtle but heartwarming touch to your letter. You can incorporate it in the body, use it as a sign-off, or add it in a P.S. at the end.
Your Emotions About the Wedding
The phrase “I am the luckiest man in the world” may seem like a cliché, but not everyone gets to marry the love of their life. Let your wife know how you feel about the wedding and getting to marry her in the first place. In the same vein, you can also express your conviction in your decision of marrying her.
Your Vision and Hopes for the Wedding
Tell your wife what you are most excited about, whether it be in the ceremony or reception. You can rave about the food you will eat, the planned send-off, and the dance moves from your families as they dance to upbeat music.
On the surface, this may seem like a minute thing. However, considering that you are just about to be married, this might be the first time you refer to her as your wife. Immortalizing this first time in a heartfelt letter makes the moment more special.
Express Faith in Your Relationship
By saying something as simple as “I believe in us,” you are expressing your trust and faith in your commitment to one another. There is no doubt that marriage can get difficult at times. However, by believing in one another and working together, you can come out of each obstacle in your married life stronger.
Tips to Keep in Mind
Give Yourself Ample Time
Most people tend to leave things to the last minute, regardless of their importance. However, this only ends up giving them more pressure, thus making the quality of the work suffer.
This applies to writing your heartfelt letter as well. As much as possible, start drafting your letter days or even weeks before the wedding ceremony. This allows you to spend more time reminiscing, reflecting, and revising your letter.
Take a Trip Down Memory Lane
As you brainstorm and plan the content of your letter, revisiting memories is a great way to get inspired. If you kept a journal at some point in your relationship, use this as a reference for reflection and writing.
Social media is also an excellent tool. Go through old photos, status updates, and messages; not only will you see how your relationship had progressed over time, but it will also give you quotes you can add to your letter for a heartwarming touch.
Draft the Letter Electronically
Before putting pen to paper, it is practical to compose your letter using your phone, laptop, or computer first. This has multiple benefits.
First and foremost, revisions can easily be made to the content of your letter and the way it is written. You can add sentences, edit phrases, reorder paragraphs, and more, with a few taps on your keyboard.
Corollary to this, you can easily spot grammatical errors and fix them accordingly. Most word processors typically have a built-in grammar checker that informs you of mistakes and points of improvement. There are applications and online websites whose purpose is to spot your oversights and help you resolve them.
Get as Personal and Intimate as You Want
The content of your letter is yours alone to decide. If there is something deeply intimate or personal you want to share, you are free to do so.
However, do note that it is typical for partners to read the letter they received aloud to a small audience and/or your videographer. Audio is also usually recorded as the letter is being read to be used in the wedding video.
If you and your wife are not comfortable with that, then it is absolutely fine to keep the letter to yourself.
Splurge on Stationery
Wedding letters are one of the most distinctive and unforgettable mementos from your wedding. Writing it with the best ink on the best paper will make it all the more treasured.
It is generally recommended that you use cream, ivory, or white paper. Moreover, you can be assured that ink will not show through if the paper has a watermark and a minimum weight of 100 gsm.
Fountain pens are the preferred writing tool for wedding letters. Blue and black ink are the most commonly used colors for the body of the letter. Ballpoint pens will also work fine.
Handwritten Letters are Better
The effort itself needed to produce handwritten letters adds to their sentiment and importance. It shows that you care enough and that you have put a lot of thought into your words.
Handwritten letters are understandably intimidating, especially for those whose penmanship may not be the greatest or most elegant. However, as long as they are legible, your words will be remembered, not your handwriting.
A trick to keep your writing straight and consistent is to put another lined sheet of paper under the paper you will write on.
Include a Treat Upon Delivery
Traditionally, a bridesmaid or groomsman is responsible for the delivery of the wedding letters. You can also have a close friend or relative do it for you.
As an additional touch, you can include some food and beverage in the delivery. Champagne is a popular option. Likewise, you can also bring some breakfast, pastry, or dessert, for your wife to munch on as she reads your heartfelt letter.
Other than your reflections and memories, you may also find inspiration to write your wedding letter in other ways. If someone you know recently got married and they read their letters aloud, you may use that as a starting point.
There are also plenty of examples of heartfelt letters online that you can use as references. Ultimately, the words and sentiments must come from you alone, but looking for guidance is perfectly acceptable and can help you write better.
Examples of Heartfelt Letters
- “To my Lovely Wife, I still remember the nerves I felt before getting down on one knee to propose to you. We were eating dinner at the restaurant we had our first date in, and you looked absolutely gorgeous in your black dress. I remember thinking in my head, “she is my choice.” I felt forever about you then, and I feel forever about you now. I cannot wait to spend the rest of my life by your side. Thank you for loving me the way I am and thank you for letting me love you in return.
All the love,
- “To my Wife and Best Friend, If you would’ve told me five years ago that we’d be here at our church, getting married in front of our closest friends and family, I would have never believed you. I would have probably thrown whatever I was eating at you, just how I always do whenever you tell me something crazy. However, even then, young as I was at 20, I knew that we had a special bond that I could never find anywhere else. Thank you for standing by me and inspiring me to be the best version of myself. Every day for the past few months, I have woken up and felt thankful that this is my life: I get to spend the rest of my life next to the most beautiful, intelligent, and caring woman. I love you.
Your ever-hungry husband.
P.S. Proverbs 13:12 – “Hope deferred makes the heart sick; but when dreams come true at last, there is life and joy.”
- “Dear Wife,It still feels surreal that I can call you that now. My wife. To be honest, the past few months of wedding planning have all been surreal — it still has not sunk in that we are getting married (maybe a kiss or two in front of our friends and families will help. I’ll let you know after.) We have known each other since we were in middle school, and we have watched each other grow up. I am so proud of the woman you were, are today, and will be in the future. A future that is bright, warm, and happy. Our future. I know that we will encounter many problems in married life, but I feel confident that we can get through every single one. I believe in you. I believe in us.
I love you with all my heart,
Writing a heartfelt letter for your wife at your wedding requires a lot of reflection and introspection. After this, you can start writing the body of the letter; the more personalized the content is, the better. Through all of this, you must be sincere and wholehearted. Genuineness is the most essential aspect of any wedding letter.